That Futurama Episode
by Moff
Summary: A very short (and slightly demented) episode of Futurama that a friend and I wrote.


That Futurama Episode  
  
  
  
EXT. PLANET EXPRESS - DAY  
  
A single hover car drives by.  
  
INT. PLANET EXPRESS - DAY  
  
Fry the Dramatic and Bender the Slightly Drunk and Odd are watching "All My Circuits," both with beer in hand.  
  
CALCULON (from TV)  
Give it to me straight, doctor.  
  
DOCTOR (also from TV)  
We have reason to believe that there is a very powerful electromagnet in your system.  
  
Fry and Bender (from couch, not TV) both laugh hysterically as Calculon gasps in horror. Leela walks in and leaps onto Fry with the agility of a cat (like Zap Branagan 'attempted' to do so to herself) and begins to "groom" him.  
  
BENDER (slightly angered)  
Aww, hell, why don't you two get a room?  
  
FRY AND LEELA (together)  
Ok!  
  
  
CUT TO:  
  
INT. BENDER'S CLOSET (FRY'S APARTMENT) - NIGHT  
  
Fry awakes in bed, and sits upright.  
  
FRY (dissapointed)  
Ohh, it was only a dream.  
  
He looks next to him and sees a sleeping naked slightly sweaty Leela beside him. He grins, but not evily or sinisterly.  
  
FRY  
Guess not!  
  
CUT TO:  
  
INT. BENDER'S CLOSET-SIZED APARTMENT - NIGHT  
  
Bender is looking at the graphic designs for the new Pentium lineup.  
  
BENDER (to himself)  
Ohh, yeah, you're a bad girl.... Ooh, didn't see that comin'!  
  
FADE OUT:  
  
DUMB COMMERCIALS MADE FOR THE FOX NETWORK  
  
FADE IN:  
  
INT. FRY'S APARTMENT - EARLY MORNING  
  
Fry has his face buried in Leela's crotch.  
  
LEELA (nearing her climax)  
OH OH YEAH! OH OH YEAH!  
  
FRY (muffled)  
Maauughff?  
  
CUT TO: SEVERAL MINUTES LATER  
  
FRY (disgusted)  
Oh! And the aftertaste!  
  
LEELA (equally disgusted)  
Well you weren't exactly 'peaches 'n' cream,' yourself!  
  
Bender enters, intending to swipe a few bananas from Fry's fruit cocktail plant. Upon seeing Fry and Leela nude and enjoying themselves, Bender begins taping.  
  
BENDER (purposely being slow)  
Oh, sorry about that. I just, uh,... FRY!! So that's where my antenna went! (pauses) Can I have it back?  
  
FRY  
Uhh, I guess so. Want me to sterilize it first?  
  
BENDER  
Nahh, it's good money on the grey market as a powerful aphrodesiac.   
  
FRY  
Kay!  
  
Fry hands Bender the slightly moist "unit of robot pride," and Bender takes it. He opens his torso-door thingy, and removes a small jar filled with an opaque liquid. He wipes the antenna fluids into it.  
  
FRY AND LEELA (slightly grossed out)  
Ewww....  
  
BENDER (slightly annoyed)  
Aww, cram it. You made it, after all.  
  
FRY  
Well, yeah.  
  
CUT TO:  
  
INT. HALLWAY IN ROBOT ARMS APARTMENTS - DAY  
  
Bender is exiting his apartment, carrying a small video tape.  
  
BENDER (quietly to himself)  
(Evil chuckles) Hello, payday!  
  
CUT TO:  
  
INT. PLANET EXPRESS MAIN OFFICE - DAY  
  
Everyone is sitting at their acustomed places, Zoidburg included. As he munches a 3000 year-old can of anchovies he obtained on the grey market, Professor Farnsworth enters.  
  
PROFESSOR  
Good news, everyone! I've discovered a new method of removing unsightly leg hair!  
  
LEELA  
Ooh! Good!  
  
PROFESSOR  
Oh, my, yes!  
  
ZOIDBURG (around a mouthful of anchovies)  
So, what is this new method?  
  
PROFESSOR  
I call it...Shaving!  
  
ZOIDBURG (wiggling his mouth tentacles)  
Ooooh....  
  
FRY  
Alright!  
  
LEELA  
Shaving? That's the most basic method!  
  
BENDER (chuckles maniacally)  
(Maniacal chuckling)  
  
PROFESSOR  
What's so funny?  
  
BENDER  
Ahah...Nibbler...Uh, nothing! Nothing at all, dammit!  
  
FRY  
Bender, you're blind stinking sober!  
  
BENDER  
Am not!  
  
FRY  
Bender!  
  
BENDER (breaking down)  
I couldn't help it! I'm only human!  
  
LEELA  
No you're not!  
  
BENDER (shrugging)  
Meh.  
  
Bender gets up and leaves. Suddenly, Bender begins to laugh maniacally. Everyone looks nervous. Nibbler, who has been sitting in Leela's lap, passes out.  
  
LEELA (concerned)  
Oh, no! Nibbler!  
  
Hermes stares off into space, his eyes devoid of any sign of intellegence.   
  
AMY  
Hey, Hermes, you're starting to look like Fry!  
  
Everyone looks to Fry, who also stares off into space. A thick stream of drool dribbles silently down his chin. No one says anything.  
  
PROFESSOR  
Good news, everyone! I've discovered a new method of removing unsightly leg hair!  
  
FADE OUT:  
  
BEGIN END CREDITS. 


End file.
